Feeling Dave Matthews-y....

I have so much that I want to work on now, that I am trying to work on. My blogging. My ministry. Helping vets. helping pets. So I thought I would write out my ideas.

Sadie Blackenrose
-write fourth book in The Stranger series
-finish up Redneck Butchers
-keeping writing on fantasy saga
-post good content on social media
-promote books

Southern Star Couture
-curate clothing content for page
-keep making shirts
*expand in to Covert Desires

Jesus Approved (my ministry)
-curate good contact
-make sure to publish every Wednesday blog
-ask others to help publish their testimony on blog
-create merch

Teddy the Terrible Terrier
-cuate content
-publish weekly blog

Hardcore Healthy
-curate content
-create accompaniment group
-create videos and build YouTube channel
-fix hula hoop
-plan fun workouts

Tales From A Broke Girl's Kitchen
-clean kitchen decently
-blog
-create videos for page and YouTube
-pictures

B&H Home Solutions
-get some sellers under contract
-go to local REI meeting
-continue to build cash buyers list
-continue to find homes

Reality of Sales
-set up conference calls
- figure out a way to monetize without charging my girls
-blo and humor for sales

Get Off My Soapbox (Bleed American)
-continue blogging
-find a way to monetize

The Veteran History Project
-contact VA and nursing homes
-find awesome geezers to interview
-Upload content to YouTube
-compile book of stories

leads in to Pet N Vets

Buck Barton's Bargain Barn
-find antiques and sell on ebay


This is my beginning list, not detailed. But hopefully it will help me keep accountable.

Taking it old school...

I am so excited to find out that I can help teach the 2nd and 3rd grade kids at VBS! It's so exciting. I get to be around little ones again. I just love kids so much. I especially like the ones I can give back. Lol. But I think it's pretty cool that I'll get to help them learn about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, perhaps help them to learn to love the Lord. It makes me feel like I'm slowly returning to myself again. Like the depression may be breaking. I pray to the Lord it is.

My husband has depression but he will never admit it because he's such a manly man. It's annoying. Sometimes I just want to be depressed and he just won't allow it. But I guess that's a good thing.

So yesterday I cleaned out the car and took Barb to the doctor and met up with my guy. Quite a lot for one day. Today Shannon and I started getting the pool area ready in the yard. Gathered up tiles to put down, stretched out the tarp. We also planted some dill and wildflowers. I also did a load of laundry and a load of dishes. I was one busy bee. I felt quite proud of myself and quite tired.

Slowly we are climbing out of the pit. Slowly. I am trying to focus on making some money myself. I think I may have found a niche with cold calling. I'm about to have a test of that with my ladies in real estate. If that's successful, I'll add on freight brokerages. I also have Sadie Blackenrose to work on, as well as Bleed American, Teddy the Terrible Terrier, Tales From a Broke's Girl's Kitchen, Southern Star Couture, Jesus Approved, Tiny Houses, B&H Home Solutions, and Attractive Haunts. Between all of that, how could I not start making some sort of money somewhere? I have to. I can't take care of Barb and work a regular job. It's just not possible, though I know that all things are possible through God.

Tomorrow will be another busy day. Tony's aunt Margaret died and we have to go to the wake. I think I will be going to the funeral as well. At least I washed some clothes. Lol.

Salem....

Tonight I choose to not blog so I can check out a new show that is in a similar time frame as my fantasy novel.....

Hell or High Water

It rained a lot here today. Memorial Day 2019. I have tried for the past few years to make Memorial Day about remembering those heroes that we have lost and not about partying and celebrating. This was a success. All day we ran around wasting gas looking for a Bitcoin ATM and the ones we found were out of service. So apparently God said no bbq chicken or cigarettes today. Fine, fine. But can I at least have a tiny bot of fun? So God sent the flood for me to play in because I had no pool, no beach, no ocean. He gave me that.

What I didn't like was my husband getting super dressed and declaring that there is no God because of our financial situation. Ugh. I have to pray harder for him. It's all so frustrating. If only he would just tell his BOSS to pay him before he goes out of town to Hawaii and forgets to do it again. Or perhaps his BOSS just thinks that we can magically make food appear out of thin air, pay for insulin with no money, keep our phones on with no money. Maybe he doesn't give two shits, but I do. I have to pray harder for his BOSS too.

Bella refuses to go out and now she is farting like crazy. I have to make her go out.

I did start writing some of the outline to my fantasy story officially out today and in my head so far my ideas are awesome. I can't wait to flesh it out more.

Not a long entry tonight, it just feels good to be journaling again.

People stuck in front of our house when it floods.

Rainy Day Woman #27

I am so depressed.

And now I'm more depressed because I wrote a whole thing about why I am depressed.

Basically it came down to because I haven't been journaling like I used to.
This is what I have left:

 car to drive, my faith in the Lord, and I'm even wearing a pretty summer dress with my shiny ring on my finger. I know that I have people who love and support me. I know that my husband loves me for some unfathomable reason. I have ideas of how to make money.

I just want that damned BBQ chicken.

That is what is left of my original post. Ugh. And now, because I did journal, I do actually feel better and I don't want to rewrite the whole dang thing over again. UGH!

So, I'll boil it down for myself: I want BBQ chicken because I smelled it earlier and now it's stuck in my head but we're broke as all get out and I can't afford no stupid BBQ chicken. GRRRRR.

Still, journaling did help me. Still want that fucking chicken, but I'm at least not crying about it.

I should be more like The Hound and just walk up in my neighbor's yard and demand all the fooking chicken.

But it is Memorial Day tomorrow, so I guess I'll try to think of something thoughtful and patriotic to do.

And hopefully I can figure out a way to get $75 by Wednesday so our gas doesn't get shut off.

This anti-depression music on YouTube is pretty good too.

Stay away from social media. Everyone just tries to make their lives seem awesome and you'll always fail by comparison.

Except to advertise your businesses. And your love of the Lord. And funny memes.

That's my new policy.